Sugar and the lack of it.

It has been a long time since I have updated my blog so I decided to get back into the swing of things. Well some of you who are reading will know from my twitter feed that I was told I have Diabetes back in October 2012. I knew I had a problem but what that problem was I did not know as I had been taking anti psychotics for my bipolar and I was noticing that my craving for sugary products like coke and sweet food and junk food was going through the roof. I will say I was not just overloading myself with these products as I am quite aware of the dangers of what happens to you if you do. I did however start to increase as weeks had passed. The real tell tale sign was my trips to the toilet I was urinating around 12 times a day.

So I went to the doctor ( GP ) and he had told me it could be from the medication and I would need to speak to my psychiatrist. I see more medical professionals then I  know what these days on account of my bipolar. Which is not a bad thing I know as I am very lucky to have the care that I do and I would never complain. Its just a bit confusing on who I should go to for what at times ha ha. I explained my case to the psychiatrist and I said for me I am at a level that I feel I do not need to be taking anti psychotic medication. ( I would like to state if you are taking this medication do not be alarmed if you feel you have a problem please talk you your doctor DO NOT just stop taking these tablets)  So I came of the medication and we had to wait a certain amount of time before we could get a proper reading on my blood. At the time I was on Olanzapine trade name Zyprexa This drug has been in the Irish news before on the 17th of January (my birthday)

Lets roll on to the 9th October 2012 I got a phone call from my GP to go into him he had my results of my lithium levels and my blood sugar results. He broke the news to me that I had type 2 Diabetes and I had a serious amount of life style changes to make. My reading for the test ( I don't know the name ) was 82. If I am honest been told I had Diabetes and also having bipolar broke my heart. You may think " oh you still have your health" well it is not really that way to me. I just feel like I am a broke man and nothing works correct in my body at all. It had a really knock on affect to me and put a right dip in my mood.


My plan of attack was to start and cut out as much sugar out of my diet. Everything became brown, rice pasta & bread. All my fluids became water no juice no coke nothing just plain H20. I cut normal potatoes out also and changed them to sweet potatoes. Now the odd time I would have something of a treat maybe a small slice of apple tart as I was told not to deprive myself of everything but learn small is good. My three square meals a day became six small meals. I did not rush out to join the gym as they said fitness was key I said I would do twenty minutes walk a day.

All of what I have listed was my battle plan for Diabetes type two. While having bipolar in my shadows now this new enemy was not going to get the better of me.  I broke the news to Mellors and she as always told me it was going to be grand and I am going to pull through. That in its self is all I need to hear as she is never wrong in my eyes. I broke the news to my second Twitter as always the feedback was super and people were quick to lend a hand. To name a few Margaret Smith gave me some super recipes which I am very grateful for. Emotional support was never far from hand from Ireland's only freelance independent nurse specialising in diabetes  Helena Farrell if I ever had a question she was happy to help me or point me in the right direction. I have to say Helen Major was a super help from the USA always checking in with me to see how I am coping and sending me on very useful information as she had a lot of first hand experience. I would say a lifesaver Those are to name a few and again I am very grateful. I have followed my regime not very strict but tight enough it really is not enjoyable but it becomes OK over time. I said to myself when I first started taken my medication for bipolar when my tablets start to  fall in numbers that would be a sign that I was getting better. So now we have to add two extra tablets a day on top of the other medication for bipolar was a little thing going off in my head saying " Ciaran you are not getting better you are getting more sick" I learned to deal with this and really accepted it for what it was.

I say to myself sometimes if it was just bipolar or just diabetes it would be OK but two at the one time really has a effect on my all ready new found sheltered lifestyle. These are just some of the random thoughts that float through this 0/100 miles a hour brain of mine. When I break it down if I am honest it has not been that hard to deal with just a lot of discipline and allow yourself the odd treat. So if you are reading this I just wanna tell you it is hard to start with but once you get on top of every thing you will be grand and I was lucky to have a lot of support from a wonderful partner that is Mellors.

I got my blood results on Monday 13th May ( which i get taken once a month ) and I am nearly in the clear a nice ol reading of 59 so I got a nice big 2 litre of coke a cola and a apple crumble. The party is over and I am back on track to my normal regime. I hope it is not long until I am in the clear I think ill stick to this lifestyle and just have the odd treat anyway.


Thanks for reading

Ciaran Behan
@mrcbehan

Heartache

So life has been getting better and better, I think the may have hit the nail on the head with this medication. Anyway, with my new lease of life, I decided right there and then, spur of the moment to go and apply for a job.
Now I had seen this job advertised in the local paper and it would be right up my alley- it was in a hotel.
I decided to get out my sunday best and make my way down, cv in hand and approach the mananger.

So here I am in the lobby, looking like a lighthouse on overdrive, trying to see if I could place him. After a while I decided to go in and ask the barman for a cup of coffee and a read of the morning newspaper. I get my coffee and newspaper and sit down and stay on look out again.

I see the manager and he calls me over for a chat. We run through the usual formalities. We come to the 'Why the gap in your cv?' question. 'What have you been doing recently? ' Even though I was expecting the question, panic set in. I wanted to explain my situation, that I had recently been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and was getting a handle on it, medication wise, but instead, for some crazy reason, I blurted out 'I had a heart problem, at 29 years of age!' I walked out of there, shaking my head in bewilderment!

Looking back at this, I realise that I was afraid I was going to be judged unfairly because of my true medical condition. I wonder to myself, should I have been completely honest? or would honesty completely ruin my chances of getting the job? I am sure there are so many other people out there like me trying to cross this hurdle. Will the stigma of mental health issues ever be broken?